In this episode Marcus shares his experiences from Steven Pressfield’s Silent Writing Retreat and the profound lessons learned about overcoming resistance in creative endeavors. He cautions against low-quality, sales-driven events and emphasizes the value of authentic connections and high-caliber speakers. Listeners are encouraged to invest wisely in live events, embrace silence for deeper focus, and push through resistance, especially after major breakthroughs.
Episode Highlights:
02:48 Lessons from the Silent Writing Retreat
03:19 The Pitfalls of Live Events
08:02 Choosing the Right Events
11:03 Key Takeaways from the Retreat
Episode Transcript:
00:02
Acta Non Verba is a show that’s raw and real, featuring hard-hitting interviews with people that live by the ethos of actions, not words. Marcus Aurelius Anderson is a TEDx speaker, best-selling author, veteran, and leadership and mindset coach.
00:17
With this show, you get to join Marcus as he goes inside the minds and experiences of the world’s most successful warriors, leaders, entrepreneurs, and experts. With each episode, you’re going to get the philosophies, concepts, tactics, and strategies these leaders use to turn adversity into victory. Live an extraordinary life based on actions, not words. Now here’s your host, Marcus Aurelius Anderson. Most of us have two lives.
00:46
The life we live and the unlived life within us. Between the two stands resistance. Stephen Pressfield, The War of Art. Stephen Pressfield started writing when he was 22 years old and had his first book, The Legend of Agravans, published 30 years later in 1995 at 52. So do you think that Steve may have some pragmatic advice about what it takes to become a successful writer after nearly 60 years practicing his craft?
01:13
I recently had the opportunity to go to Stephen Prestol’s Silent Writing Retreat, which was a collaboration with bestselling author Rhoda Amid in Malibu, California, and it absolutely exceeded my expectations. So here are my Warrior Wisdom 2.19. These are my takeaways from Stephen Prestol’s Writing Retreat, plus my recommendations for finding live events to attend in the future. I’m Marcus Aurelius Anderson, and this is another installment of Octagon on Verba’s Warrior Wisdom.
01:41
In these shorter solo episodes, I’ll highlight lessons from more years past and present, in all kinds of settings from the battlefields of Italy, Greece, Japan, and the Middle East, to more modern day warfare including tactics seen today in business, society, and culture. I’ll also be sharing leadership lessons based on my own teachings and experiences. The reality is this, the world is a battlefield, and to not master these lessons leaves you
02:11
Now on to the lesson. If you’ve heard of the War of Art, Pressfield’s legendary nonfiction book, and if you haven’t, then go grab a copy right now, then you know that Pressfield talks about the force that all entrepreneurs, leaders, writers, creatives, and artists face that he calls resistance. This workshop was an absolute masterclass on how to identify, face, and overcome resistance of all kinds to reach a higher level in any area that you wish to improve.
02:38
Reading about it is one thing, and I’ve read all of Prestil’s works, literally, but hearing it directly from the author in his own words was an absolute game changer for me. And before I get into my main takeaways from this event, I’d like to encourage everyone listening to invest in themselves by attending some sort of event in person at least once a year. And here’s some things to look out for and to keep in mind when selecting an event, when you’re trying to invest in yourself as well as the event, and then things to avoid when looking for an event as well.
03:08
Now, I started going to live events nearly 10 years ago as a way to meet people and learn from others. And I was new in this space and there were many people putting out live events at the time. Here are a few things that I learned along the way. There are many kinds of live events that you can attend in person, but the ones that cost the least end up being the most expensive in the long run. So what do I mean by that? Yes, you can go to a free local event or travel to an event that costs $97 for admission.
03:35
But there is a reason why such events are so inexpensive. The first live event that I traveled across the country to attend was just such an event, and man, did it cost me. Now, when I walked in, the event was filled with people that would immediately come up to you and introduce themselves. They’d hand you a business card and ask if you had a coach or were a member of a mastermind. It seemed everybody there was a pushy used car salesman that was trying to monetize their podcast and their brand as much as they possibly could.
04:03
This felt incredibly fake and vapid to me. Finally, the speakers got on stage and grabbed the mic. And I was grateful for the reprieve from those that were trying to pitch me something in the audience. But my relief was short-lived, because every single speaker on that stage, and I used the word speaker very loosely here, because none of them were really speaking, they were just salesmen trying to sell from the stage. Every single one would come up, brag about themselves and what they’ve accomplished, whether it be the business they built.
04:30
the online course that they’ve created, the mastermind that they have, et cetera. And then they would go on to pitch everyone in the audience the same business course or mastermind that they were just dragging about. For a special discounted price, it was good for today and today only. Their entire keynote was just one great big sales pitch. What was sad was this didn’t just happen one time. It happened every single time with every speaker that came on stage that day. Not one of them provided anything of quality to the audience.
04:59
They just try to speak louder, faster, or more charismatically than the one before them in hopes that they could get you to buy their product before anybody else did. It was repulsive. By the time we broke for lunch, I left the event and never came back. Yes, it only cost me $97 to get in, but I would never get that time back, and I could have done lots of things with that time that would have been much more beneficial to me. Hell, just taking a nap or going for a walk would have been much more valuable to me than just being around a bunch of grifters trying to sell me something.
05:30
Now, a friend of mine is the one that convinced me to go to this event. And they said, well, not all events are like this. You should go to this next one that I have in mind. And in fact, this event that they were discussing actually asked me to speak for a breakout section. So while being a speaker in such an event is a better place to attend from. In my case, I was the only person that spoke that did not try to sell anything. A similar phenomenon occurred after I left the stage. I had people approach me much in the same way as the previous event.
06:00
But in this case, everyone had an angle to make money off of me because they were telling me that I need to, quote, scale and monetize my brand, unquote. At this point in the event, after another interaction with another glorified solicitation, I stepped away to look at the entire circus from a secluded area in the corner to change my orientation and get away from people. As I saw this continue to unfold before me, I asked myself.
06:27
Is this really where I’m going to find the people that I genuinely want to meet and connect with? Are these people that I want to do business with in the future? The answer was a resounding no. And I use this question to guide me every single time that I go for a live event and it has saved me a ton of time, money and frustration.
06:46
Also, as a rule, I avoid online-only events for a similar reason, which is also why I will never speak at such events, even though I’m asked to do so constantly. I avoid online events because the business model is as follows. An organizer, who can be basically anybody, tries to approach as many speakers as they can to create the sheer volume of speakers necessary to attract as many attendees as possible. Now, the organizer doesn’t want to pay the speakers, and they usually don’t.
07:15
But they will say that it is a great way to get exposure and experience. And as a speaker, I’ve said this before, exposure can kill you. They will often inflate the numbers of those that will be attending and hopes to attract bigger name speakers. They will make the event incredibly inexpensive or almost free for anyone to attend because their goal is to build up their mailing list to spam you later and try to sell you products on the back end. These unscrupulous organizers will also be happy to sell the email list that they just created.
07:45
namely your information to others to make a buck.
07:50
And I found out that this was similar to what was happening in that first event that I described, and that every event organizer was getting a percentage of what each speaker was selling from the stage. So understand that and buyer beware. So now I’m very selective about the events that I attend and none of them are inexpensive for this very reason. In recent years, the only events that I’ve gone to have been by the RTA Syndicate, by Jocko Willink’s Echelon Front, and in this case, Stephen Pressfield’s. Unless it’s an event that I’m actually speaking at.
08:18
In which case I still use a similar mentality. Unless these are people that I actually want to interact with and learn from, I’m not going to speak at the event just for a buck. And the reason why I go to the events that I mentioned was, again, the Arte Syndicate made by Andy Frisell at my lead. I’ve been a member of them for six years. They always have top caliber people, mainly the last person that I saw speak in an Arte event was named David Goggins. Echelon fronts events with Jocko Willink and Leif Babin. Again, they have built a time tested leadership principle.
08:48
And I think that that’s something that is very worth going to. And the events that I go to the council are very much the most elite version of that. So that I’m around 30 other people that are very much investing in themselves and their business from that kind of idea. The same thing goes with this event with Steven Pressfield. So why go to such events that there are so many pitfalls? When you go to an event that has the caliber of people that you want to meet, or the kind of people that you would like to become, you end up having some incredible experiences.
09:17
You’ll also build your business, but not in the way that many think. If you go to an event and are just authentically yourself, that’s when you connect with people. Each person that you meet and each conversation that you have is an opportunity to help somebody. I’ve had people that I met and spoke with over five years ago that have currently reached out to hire me to speak for their event, do workshops for their company or organization, or hire me specifically for individual coaching.
09:44
And in each of these encounters, I never once asked for their business directly. Here’s the reality. If your message authentically resonates with them, they will absolutely seek you out. 80 to 90% of my business comes from people seeing me speak in person at an event, our referrals from past and current clients, or our intros made specifically from people that know my work and trust me. This is why social media is something that I do to maintain as a presence yet.
10:11
It’s not something that I’m working to actively cultivate to go viral in any capacity to me being famous on social media is like being rich in monopoly. Yes, I’ll use it as a way to help promote my new book, my apparel line and have relevance. And you could even say in some ways that this podcast is a form of social media, but I’m using it with a desire to create something that is of quality and value to everyone involved from the guest to the audience listening. I warned about these predatory events, not to be moan the industry or to say that all events are bad.
10:41
Many are good and there’s nothing wrong with trying to make money by helping people, as long as it is a very authentic and un-predatory way. I’m just giving you the insider perspective so that you can better understand how you would like to spend your time and money on any event. These past experiences, both good and bad, have also influenced how I do my live events that I put on as I move forward. So, with all of that being said, here are some of my takeaways from the Silent Writing Retreat with Steven Pressfield in Malibu, California.
11:11
Number one, the location was beautiful. And once we got there and said our hellos, we were asked to silence our cell phones and put them in a designated area as soon as we entered the event space. And for some, you could see that this was nerve wracking, but we were allowed to have access to our phones periodically throughout the day in case of emergencies. But to me, the silence was refreshing and allowed me a much deeper focus and presence, not only for when Steve was speaking, but it also helped me find more substance to the writing and prompts that we were given.
11:41
We also did a Q&A at the end of the event to break the silence. The only drawback to the silence was that we weren’t able to clap or encourage Steve as he was giving us some of the most profound insights that I’ve ever heard on the creative process and how to battle the demons in our minds for years at a time to finish a book, a project, or launch a business. Another takeaway is those that have read the War of Art know the story that Pressfield tells of when he was driving a cab in New York City while living in a run-down sublet.
12:10
in an effort to finish his first novel. And he’d been trying for years to do so, but he was never able to finish because every time he would get close, he would blow it up somehow with self-sabotage. One evening when he couldn’t take it anymore, he got out his vintage Smith-Cruena typewriter and just started banging something out. He said that it was total garbage and he immediately crumpled it up and threw it in the trash, but he felt somehow lighter after the session. He even found that he had the energy to…
12:38
do the stack of dirty dishes that have been piling up all week, like a form of catharsis. As he was doing the dishes, he noticed that he was whistling. He now knew that he had overcome resistance, the force that Pressfield calls, anything that stops us from becoming a better version of ourselves through procrastination, fear, or self-sabotage. He’d turn a corner. He’d had a huge breakthrough. And while that was true, here’s the point that Steve made that made a big impact on me.
13:07
And listen, I’ve read that story many times, I’ve heard it many times. Steve even talks about it when I interviewed him here on Octa Non Verba a few times. But it would nearly be 15 years after that before his first book was published. The lesson here is that we all think that once we’ve learned to overcome resistance, or that we’ve got beyond this sticking point, that we will be guaranteed to have success as our next destination. That is a fallacy.
13:37
Even when we learn the lesson, turn the corner, and reach a new level, even after we’ve had a huge breakthrough, we will still have to work hard and often for years just to get to the next place. In fact, in some ways, it’s almost more difficult now because we know without a doubt that we can do what needs to be done to succeed. We just see that it’s going to be a long, laborious road to reach that place. And for many, this may be even more difficult to accept than overcoming resistance in the first place. Remember.
14:07
It took Pressfield 30 years of writing as an abject failure, as he says, before his first book was published. So use this knowledge to inspire you when you feel like quitting, when facing resistance or adversity. Now there was a lot of takeaways and I want to be respectful to the material that Pressfield gave. But my last takeaway, which I think is going to be impactful for everyone is this. Steve tells of the most common times that we will want to give up in the process.
14:34
And he says, one of the most surprising time is after we finished the project. He tells the story of an author friend that he knew that had finally completed the manuscript typing the end after years of heart-wrenching work. His friend literally had it put in a binder, had it packed up in a packing envelope and was dressed to mail out to his agent and publisher. But he couldn’t put the damn thing in the mailbox. His friend eventually died without ever sending his work.
15:04
His point? Sometimes the place we will grapple with resistance the most is when we’re finished. We’ll second guess ourselves and wonder why we were stupid enough to even think that anybody would care about what we’re creating and what we wrote. He even told everyone in attendance that he feels that way every single time he starts a new book or a new project. Even after nearly 60 years at his craft, Pressfield still feels resistance and fights it every single day.
15:33
He says resistance wakes up with him in the morning as soon as his eyes are open. Then Steve said something else that I will never forget. He stopped, paused and looked in the audience and said this, “‘The blank page is not neutral. It is openly hostile.’ And I felt that in my soul as he said it.” He uses this knowledge to attack it with everything that he’s got before it takes a hold of him. You’re after action items for these lessons for the next 30 days.
16:03
Number one, back to the live events. If you’re going to attend a live event, be very selective about which ones you invest in. Look at the advertisement, ask yourself if the kind of people that you would like to meet are gonna be there. Also, when possible, pay for the top tier ticket as it will help you get the most out of the event and opportunities that it may present. If it’s an event that has some sort of ad with somebody yelling in your face like a drill sergeant, I would recommend that you avoid it. And then honestly, to be completely candid, a few names to steer clear of.
16:33
Wes Watson, Andy Elliott, and Grant Cardone. I’ve heard from many people firsthand and vicariously that they will not have the most value for you in mind, and it will probably not be something worth attending. Number two, never underestimate the power of silence. I did a Warrior Wisdom episode about this earlier this year and the advantage of letting your mind unwind, so to speak. I believe the silence
17:01
in this event help prime me for upcoming events in my life, for my writing, et cetera. So for you, the next 30 days, ask yourself, where can you deploy silence to help you find peace, clarity, and purpose in your life and in your business? Number three, the breakthrough behind the breakthrough. Even after having a breakthrough, we’re still not out of the woods yet, and there’s still plenty of work that needs to be done. So for the next 30 days, ask yourself this.
17:30
Where have you turned a corner and leveled up and made a big breakthrough and then stalled to keep from making progress? Where are you not applying the insights that you’ve gained from hard earned breakthroughs? And how is that impeding your future progress? Finally, remember, one of the times that resistance will make us doubt ourselves the most is after we finally completed the project. So for the next 30 days, ask yourself, where are you letting doubt creep in to slow you from finishing your work?
18:01
Send it, make it happen, put it in the mailbox. In other words, where are you dragging your feet and accomplishing something that you’ve worked so hard only to hesitate because of doubt? Examine this in other areas of your life from relationships, physical, financial, and spiritual.
18:20
thus end at the lesson. If you enjoy this and any of the other over 200 episodes of Octo Nonverba, I highly recommend going through the entire Octo Nonverba catalog that include other Warrior Wisdom episodes. And as a matter of fact, I would go, if you enjoyed this one with Steven Pressfield, I would go to episodes 41, 42, and 106, as those are all direct interviews with Steve. And then I have other Warrior Wisdom episodes with some of his content as well, including the War of Art.
18:49
None of these episodes are behind a paywall or a Patreon. They are all available for free. So go check them out right now. While you’re there, hit subscribe and tell us what you think about this episode on Spotify or iTunes or wherever you listen to Acta Non Verba.
